Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Randomize
