i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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