he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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