i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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