Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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