Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
