whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
