so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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