fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
