Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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