yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I wear drunk well.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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