I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
