I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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