it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize