He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Randomize
