Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
