I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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