The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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