party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Randomize
