carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
