And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
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