Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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