Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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