I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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