member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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