Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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