so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
