Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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