No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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