Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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