found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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