I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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