He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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