talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
