your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
