Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
