This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize