At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
