yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Randomize
