so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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