i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
