So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
