Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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