I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
