Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
