Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Someone signed my nipple.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
