just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
It's just like the Real World with babies
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.