she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
