wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
