what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
